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Long Awkward Pause’s Holiday Wine Buying Guide

November 24, 2014 // 16 Comments

Ahhh, it’s that time of year again. All those drunken family get-togethers, work events, neighborhood gatherings all filled with merriment, dancing, and probably a decent amount of debauchery. Holidays? Heck, that was my last weekend. The holidays can be a very stressful time. Maybe you have to think of an excuse for skipping out on [Click For More]

Inventive Excuses To Not Go To Work

September 11, 2014 // 21 Comments

Every now and then life conspires against us and causes uncontrollable events. These events intersect our lives in a way that can have very real job consequences. In these sphincter-tightening moments, it helps to have a solid [Click For More]

An Unacceptable Amount of Mayonnaise – A Letter To Jimmy Johns

September 2, 2014 // 37 Comments

Dear Mr. James of the Family John, I’ll drop the formalities, Jimmy John; I’m going to be frank. Yesterday I thought I ordered a sandwich, but upon unwrapping the culinary atrocity you’d delivered I found nothing except disappointment and confusion—much like a child tearing open a birthday present only to find this year’s [Click For More]