ebola

Read This Before You Lick Your Keyboard

May 18, 2015 // 35 Comments

Fun quiz here, people: one of the most germ-ridden areas of your house is: The toilet Your butthole The TV remote Your keyboard If you answered A or C, you’re close. If you answered B, you didn’t read the question, unless you happen to live up your own ass. I understand this happens to some people from the neck up, but I [Click For More]

SPECIAL REPORT: Ebola virus may spread faster than Brad-Angelina sex tape

October 16, 2014 // 43 Comments

To avoid creating widespread panic with that headline, let me begin by assuring everyone there’s NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT! You did not somehow miss a Brad and Angelina sex tape that was leaked onto the Internet. However, before giving a huge sigh of relief, there’s still that whole Ebola thing going on in Texas which, depending on who [Click For More]

Inventive Excuses To Not Go To Work

September 11, 2014 // 21 Comments

Every now and then life conspires against us and causes uncontrollable events. These events intersect our lives in a way that can have very real job consequences. In these sphincter-tightening moments, it helps to have a solid [Click For More]