Latest And Greatest

LAP

The Sisterwives Mistakenly Interview Us

September 15, 2015 // 25 Comments

There is a group of powerful women writers who have collected together and formed the website: The Sisterwives. Should it be whom have collected? I don’t know. The grammar police will email me soon. They always do. I probably should have paid more attention in English class, but alas I have always run away from the thought of putting words [Click For More]

Over the Line Podcast #20 Dancing With The Starless

September 9, 2015 // 2 Comments

On Today’s Show: Topics include I have your back maybe, The trouble with ordering Poker party food, Carry out tipping etiquette, Fall sports, Coach is fired after one episode, Galaxy Quest comes to TV, The Muppets and Kermit the Frog’s new swine american controversery, Backstreet Boys vs All Other Boy Bands, Season Premiers, The [Click For More]

Word Has It

August 31, 2015 // 12 Comments

One fun annual event you might be unaware of is the Oxford English Dictionary’s release of new words. This announcement always entertains. At the same time, it can be frightening because you can think of it as a thermostat of how fast we’re dumbing the hell out of ourselves. Srsly. But on to the awesomesauce! You can read the entire [Click For More]

Hair of the Dog That You Bit

August 4, 2015 // 22 Comments

I’ve been fortunate enough to have some great food experiences around the country and around the world. I’ve had crepes from a cart across from Notre Dame in Paris. I’ve eaten at Michelin-starred restaurants in New York. I’ve eaten sushi off the body of a naked Ariana Grande while on one of the Sultan of Brunei’s larger boats.   [Click For More]

Heavenly Bodies

July 27, 2015 // 22 Comments

Long Awkward Pause readers are hip, informed and intelligent people. Because this is true, you like to Science, and I’ve been assigned an article to expand your universe. At least to bring space to your place. So I’m about to get all Neil deGrasse Tyson here. Maybe you thought by reading the title that this post would feature boobs. I [Click For More]

2015 Advice To Graduates

May 27, 2015 // 24 Comments

Howard the manager got a request for a graduation speaker.  I was not his first choice to fill the ticket.  Actually I think he tried to get a guest blogger when the rest of the staff were busy, but the email found my inbox.  He cautioned me about not making a scene or something like that, with words about student protests and such.  Anyway, I [Click For More]

Win One Zero One The Card Game!

April 29, 2015 // 19 Comments

Now that Long Awkward Pause has hit the big time…and by big time we mean ALL of our Moms now read it…we have stock piled a mass of things to give away. (Big thanks to my Mom for finally jumping on board. She was the last lone hold out.) Who doesn’t like to receive things for free? Unless it’s a STD…everyone! (Some [Click For More]

The Long Awkward St. Patrick’s Day Review

March 17, 2015 // 33 Comments

I’m trying to type quietly because I want to die.  In a burst of corporate largesse, Howard flipped me the LAP Corporate Black Card.  He commissioned me and De Voss to conduct holiday research on St. Patrick’s Day from a Boston pub crawl perspective.  What follows are my notes, made along the way.  Enjoy.  I’m going off to [Click For More]

LAP Interviews ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ Moviegoers

February 19, 2015 // 12 Comments

Since the release of Fifty Shades of Grey over Valentine’s Day weekend, everyone’s been talking (at a volume low enough so that no one can actually hear them) about this cinematic interpretation of E.L. James’s seminal contribution to literature. We’ve all seen who’s reading Fifty Shades of Grey, but who’s willing to pay ten bucks [Click For More]

Spoiler Alert:  Ted 2 Movie Trailer Review

February 16, 2015 // 6 Comments

America’s favorite beer-battered stuffed animal is back in theaters soon, which will be Seth MacFarlane’s second big-screen crack at animating a character that doesn’t sound exactly like Peter Griffin. The first installment of the series added Ted’s name to a growing list of other famous character bears including:  Fozzie, Winnie, [Click For More]

Updated Cliches For The Social Media World

February 9, 2015 // 20 Comments

Cliches have been around for centuries. We all know them. We all use them. Some of us love them. Some of us love them too much. One subject cliches have yet to tackle is: Social Media! You know…Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, FarmersOnly.com, etc. We understand that most of these sayings were written around the same time that the Bible hit [Click For More]