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Eclectic; A Hipster Conversation

byline: Jude the Hipster
Eclectic; a hipster conversation
From the Merriam Webster online dictionary- ECLECTIC: (n) one who uses a method or approach that is composed of elements drawn from various sources; one who uses an eclectic method or approach.
For the most part, people who use the term “eclectic” really piss me off.  Generally, people who throw this term aimlessly into the air from their PBR stained lips are hipsters or contestants on the Bachelor.  (For brevity purposes, I’m going to focus on hipsters.)
Hipsters are always trying to sound cooler than the current year they live in.  Let me explain a bit here. They never live in the present, that would be far too practical and mainstream. They are either dressing, talking, smelling like they live in a previous era or they are attempting to create a new, futuristic beard/side-burn concoction.
But at the end of the day, they are exactly like every other douche bag who is trying overly hard to be fancier than the obscure craft beer they are drinking.  In their effort to be diverse, they all end up being the exactly the same.
Here’s a small example of how the conversation may go down: (a normal, secure person sparking up a conversation with a Hipster)
Normal Secure Person: Hi there, what kind of music do you like?
  Hipster: Well, I have a very eclectic taste in music.  I listen to a wide variety of artists, except Top 40 of course.  I don’t like to categorize anything or pigeon hole any artists, that would be unfair to their process.Inline image
Normal Secure Person: Wow, that was an especially ironic answer.  What exactly do you do for a living?
  Hipster: I work at the vintage record store downtown across from Starbucks.
Normal Secure Person: Fuck off, do the world a favor and wear some deodorant.
“Eclectic” was once a lovely word until hipsters turned it into an annoying, buzzing ear dagger. It saddens me that hipsters overuse this word in an attempt to validate their marginal lives.  I don’t make this shit up.  If you don’t believe me, go stand outside any big city consignment shop and open your ears……… but be sure to close your nostrils.
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12 Comments on Eclectic; A Hipster Conversation

  1. Personally, I feel this is brilliant. But, I may be a bit biased.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I don’t think I ever hear anything about hipsters without the word “vintage” in it either. They have totally ruined that word for me as well.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. This was cool before it was even published online. I don’t get hipsters. They want to be achingly different than everything ‘mainstream,’ yet now that hipster-ism is mainstream, are they not collectively a group of hypocrites? Or rather, hipstercrites?

    Liked by 2 people

    • DUH'Merica // January 22, 2016 at 7:59 am //

      That’s great. I never thought much of them until they started coming to my favorite bars. I have an aversion to patchouli and cigarettes, makes my beer taste funny.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Watch out, because the next step is they’ll be doorbelling you and asking, “Can I talk to you about our Lord and Savior, Toilet Fork Symphony?” (TFS would be an unheard-of indie band that has no specific sound, but does great covers, for money, in bars, where there’s chickenwire between them and the audience)

        Liked by 1 person

        • I got doorbelled once in the Puerto Penasco jail… I’m pretty sure his name was Jesus and he was singing “Don’t Stop Believin'”. So it happens.

          Liked by 1 person

  4. PBR has never left a stain on anything but my soul… and the floorboard of my high school buddies car… and my prom dates dress… damn. Never mind.

    Liked by 1 person

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