If you make a guy Pinterest famous…
It might explain why the cashier at CVS is giving you weird looks…
At first you were thinking it was the huge armpit stains on your shirt, but now…now you know better. She recognized you from your uber popular and super cool Pinterest board:
51 Tie Dye Do It Yourself Projects
That has to be it. That board has 53 followers!
Maybe she wanted some professional advice on Tie Dying her cat?
That would be bad because in reality you have never tied dyed anything in your life. All you really did was repin someone else’s link on Tie Dye…
No one can know this now…this is your first step into becoming immortal on the internet…
Maybe you should go to the library to look up tie dying…
But who goes to the library anymore?
You should Google it. That’s so much easier.
But what if someone were to discover your Google search history? They would know that you created the award winning Tie Dye board BEFORE you actually knew about Tie Dying anything! Even if you erase your browsing history, there are people who are skilled enough to find it.
Those…what are they called? CSI people? Or is it NCSI people?
You get confused, but you do know two things:
1) Some sort of SI people can recreate your Google history
2) You have now become the foremost expert on all things Tie Dye thanks to this CVS cashier knowing who you are…and you don’t even have a clue about Tie Dye at all.
Damn it for being so popular on Pinterest! Hell, maybe the whole internet! Probably in space as well since everything we broadcast is beamed out there!
Wouldn’t it be cool if aliens landed on Earth in tie dyed flip flops! You would be responsible for that!
You would probably even end up on the Today show!
President Obama may want to talk to you…
The Aliens would think you are some sort of Ambassador for Earth…
Also, the Aliens would owe you so much for shaping their culture. And all of this because you repin someone else’s link on Tie Dye.
That CVS cashier was so nervous to talk to you.
Listen CVS cashier…you are just a regular walking, talking, eating, pooping person like anyone else…
just like George Clooney…
just like President Obama…
just like the Aliens…except the Aliens poop out of their elbows, but other than that, just like everyone else.
Should you go back and talk to the CVS cashier? Give her a little thrill in her otherwise ordinary dull life. It would even give her a good story to tell her Great Great Meemaw about her work day today.
Great Great Meemaw: How was work today sweetie?
CVS Cashier: You would never guess who came into the store?
Great Great Meemaw: Aliens wearing Tie Dyed flip flops?
CVS: No. That’s weird. It was that Pinterest guy!
Great Great Meemaw: *turns off hearing aid*
Her Great Great Meemaw would certainly be thrilled because she probably has her own Pinterest account full of knitting and cats. She has probably run across your Tie Dye board on more than one occasion.
What if the original person who posted the Tie Dye picture suddenly gets mad at you for becoming so famous while they did not? You are on the red carpet now and they are nowhere…forgotten in the layers and layers of repins.
What if they try to sue you?
What if they take you to court and you end up in jail?
Then you would have to be put into isolation because of your fame. The other prisoners might try to shank you.
That’s the correct word, right?
That word makes us hungry.
Or the prisoners might make you their leader because your so famous and NOW your famous for crimes against the Pinterest world. You could hold little underground prison classes on how to Pinterest for fun and profit to help the prisoners get rehabilitated.
You could get a Pinterest tattoo.
But then the non-Pinterest criminals might get angry and try to kill you…
Which means you might have to be moved to a secret Illuminate prison. Once you get out, you could write a book on your adventures and start a Pinterest account to help market the book.
That account would probably have a lot of followers and make you famous…so famous that a random CVS cashier might recognize you while your standing in line waiting to purchase two boxes of toothpaste, a pack of batteries, and a family sized pouch of skittles.
How much do you think you could charge for your autograph?
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