This was supposed to be an interview with author and humorist Rodney Lacroix, but since the man decided to release a book* and get married in the same week, I decided to do him a favor…well, more his for his bride… I decided do the article without him. Rodney agreed to do the interview mind you, but I have learned that women are crazy, especially when they are getting married…or eating, or watching TV, or…even sleeping!
So, you know Rodney…you owe me. I saved your marriage before it even began. I had made plans to fly to New Hampshire and meet Rodney on his home turf. I thought we would conduct the interview in a local Gastropub. I’m not sure what a Gastropub is, but it has the word gas in it, so I thought Rodney might like that. Then I would order us two Kentucky Breakfast Stouts, a local New Hampshire brew, which I would have thought would thoroughly impress Rodney of my Google researching skills, only to find out neither him nor the bartender had ever heard of this beer. Strike one. (Why would a New Hampshire beer be named after another state anyway? Is that a New England thing? Every time I see the word Hampshire I think about The Shire** and laundry, and I envision the state full of laundry wielding Hobbits. Rodney would not let me look at his feet, so I have no confirmation on this.) Since Rodney owns a motorcycle I thought I would show up in full Harley Davidson attire: shirtless black skull leather vest, chaps with the fringe, red bandanna skull cap, acid washed jeans, big heeled black boots, chained wallet, and a ZZ Top press-on beard. Rodney will probably come dressed in something like this:
Strike Two. Then I thought I might make him feel at ease with me because we have some things in common:
ComputersMe – Supports restaurant staff on using software including point of sale and backoffice applications Rodney – A Software Quality Engineer. (If it has Engineer in the title you know it’s an important position. The closest I would ever have to Engineer in my title is if I drove a train. The closest I will ever have to driving a train, is riding on a train.)
Social MediaMe – Strong internet presence including thousands of combined followers on Twitter and Facebook. Works on two award winning blogs, and has high Klout scores. Rodney – Uber internet presence including millions of combined followers on Twitter and Facebook. His one blog Midget Man of Steel readership triples my two blogs, and I’m pretty sure Klout is Rodney’s bitch.
PublishingMe – Several short stories published. Rodney – TWO books!
Strike Three! So with all that said, let’s talk about Rodney’s newest book; Perhaps I Have Said Too Much. Rodney is one of those in-your-face-no-holds-barred comedy writers. He will poke fun at you, but he is also not afraid to poke fun at himself. Like his first book, Things Go Wrong For Me, this one you will find some familiar ground. There are original funny drawings and twitter-like “brain nuggets” of wisdom sprinkled throughout the chapters. But unlike the first one, this book has an underLYING theme. See how I cleverly told you the book is about lying without saying the book is about lying. That’s what big time authors like myself and Rodney do. That’s why we are so gosh darn good at our craft. Well, at least that’s what I think Rodney would say…the man has published two books after all!
The first story really sets the tone for the whole book (and explains the cover).Rodney – loved The Six Million Dollar Man as a kid. Me – loved The Six Million Dollar Man as a kid. First base! (Note from the desk H. Gantz, manager of Long Awkward Pause: Please have Chris remove the first base reference from this article. I get the baseball reference call back from earlier in the article, but it makes it sound like Chris is feeling up this Rodney guy. Also please make sure you remove this note before publishing. You guys never do. I don’t understand why. I really don’t!)
It’s all about how Rodney channeled Steve Austin, The Six Million Dollar Man into his finger to impress his friends while being stuck during an indoor recess one day. In case you are too young to know who Steve Austin, The Six Million Dollar Man is…he is a guy that crashed his super duper…probably six million dollar fighter jet…into the ground. So the government, who already lost six million dollars, decided to invest another six million dollars into this guy and replace his limbs and eye with bionic parts. This gave him super slow motion strength and speed and a cool eheheheheheheh noise whenever he moved. The best episode is when Steve Austin, The Six Million Dollar Man, fought Bigfoot. It’s a two parter. Go find it and watch it. Anyway… Rodney tells the one kid about how his finger now has bionics in it, but please don’t tell anyone. Right! Soon the whole class knows about the “bionic finger” as Rodney is now made to prove this lie by trying to shove it through a textbook. My favorite part of the story is when his classmates are actually hearing the gears grind inside of his non-bionic, bionic finger. It goes to show you, sometimes you want to believe in things no matter how far fetch they may seem.
And I kind of think that’s what this book is truly about. Humans want and need to believe the fantastical, and people’s need to laugh and escape life’s day to day humdrums. When you read the book, you kind of root for Rodney, to build his lies and get away with them, like an anti-hero hero. Like the Incredible Hulk. The Incredible Hulk of lying. What? Never mind. Just know that like his first book, this is a fun read. Rodney will make you laugh. That’s really the bottom line here, the straight dope, the bee’s knees, and about twelve other weird old 1920’s expressions. I got a free copy to review, but I shelled out money for the hardcover copy as well. If that’s not a testament for you to read it, then I don’t what would be…As a matter of fact, I think that is the perfect review: I gots a free copy, but I bought it anyway. (Note from the desk H. Gantz, manager of Long Awkward Pause: Tell Chris that is not a perfect review. Once again, please do not include this note. PLEASE!) (Note from the desk H. Gantz, manager of Long Awkward Pause: I hate you guys!) Places to find Perhaps I’ve Said Too Much: