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Picture Prompt: While My Keytar Gently Weeps. In my Bed.

Chowderhead

Chowderhead says:

Before putting on my bifocals, I thought I was looking at a crash test dummy about to get scooped up by a tractor shovel:

La La La La La! Doo dee doo! La La! Great balls of fire!

La La La La La! Doo dee doo! La La! Great balls of fire!

Man, I was way off.

But that woulda been just as cool as learning how to play the piano..while sleeping..at the same time.

If that were me laying in bed playing the piano, I’d get about three notes in before getting elbow-dropped by the Sandman.

Something like this:

*cracks knuckles*

*clears throat*

“Mr. Sandman!  Bring me a dream!  Make her the…….zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.”

*wakes up*

“Bah!  Where am I!”

“Ah yes, I was playing the piano, but I fell asleep.  Let’s start from the top again, only this time I should play louder so that I don’t fall asleep again, because I’m trying to play the piano and not sleep:”

*yawns*

*cracks knuckles*

“Mr. Sandman!  Bring me a dream!  Make her the…….zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.”

*wakes up*

“Bah!  Where am I!!!”

“Ah yes, I was playing the piano, but I fell asleep again.  Let’s start from the t–

–you know what, fuck this shit.  Where’s the TV remote?”

*****

Marketing and Product Development sure have come a long way since humans had to live in the black and white world.  It seems like people back then would buy just about anything that showed up on their front door step in the hands of some sooty sales dude:

*knock at the door*

June Cleaver:  (answers door)  Well hello there, young man.  How can I help you today?

Salesguy:  Good afternoon, ma’am.  I’m here on behalf of the Useless Home Products Corporation, and I’d like to sell this to you.

June Cleaver:  Well, what in heaven’s name is it?

Salesguy:  It’s a bed piano.  The finest model ever constructed to date.  In fact, it’s made out of a brand new space age material called, plastic.

June Cleaver:  Oh!  Wait, let me call my husband to the door!  He just has to see this!  Walt!  Walt, come to the foyer!  There’s an extremely polite and trustworthy young man at the door who wants to sell us something!”

*Walt enters wearing a sweater vest*

Walt Cleaver:  Well, hi there.  What can I do for you, young man?

Salesguy:  Good afternoon, sir.  I’m here on behalf of the Useless Home Products Corporation, and I’d like to sell this to you.

Walt Cleaver:  Well, I’ll be.  That looks like a bed piano!

Salesguy:  Yes sir, it sure is!  The highest quality bed piano on the market today.

Walt Cleaver:  You know, I was a pianist (editor’s note:  sounds like penis) back in my younger years.  Fancy that you’d show up right here on my front door step!  What’s your asking price?

Salesguy:  I’m happy to inform you that today is your lucky day.  The Useless Home Products Corporation is currently running a half off sale on this exact model, bringing the total cost to only $5999.99.

June Cleaver:  Oh Walt, I think we should get one.  Maybe it will inspire you to start playing again!

*scratches chin*

Walt Cleaver:  Well.  I have to hand it to you, young man: you’re one heck of a salesman.  That’s just too good of a bargain to pass on.

Salesguy:  Well thank so kindly, Mr…?

Walt Cleaver:  Cleaver.  Walt Cleaver.

Salesguy:   Thank you, Mr. Cleaver.  And how will you be paying for the bed piano today?

*laughs*

Walt Cleaver:  How about that, June!   The boy’s got a sense of humor too!  Remind me to get your supervisor’s telephone machine number.  I think he needs to hear a few reasons why I think you should be getting a little bump in your commission pay!

*laughs all around*

Walt Cleaver:  I’ll be paying cash.

*****

Simple times…

\m/

Adam Final Author Box

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38 Comments on Picture Prompt: While My Keytar Gently Weeps. In my Bed.

  1. Reblogged this on Chowderhead and commented:

    Today over at Long Awkward Pause, I took on the Picture Prompt Challenge. My manager Howard Gantz spun the bingo ball and tossed me a photo of some chick in the 1930’s playing a bed piano. What’s a bed piano you ask? It’s exactly what it sounds like: it’s a piano. That you play in bed.

    Check it out, it’s a funny read!

    Like

  2. Adam,
    Ah, the good ol’ days of bed pianos and telephone machines, I remember them well.
    Wait, when did June dump Ward for Walt? The beaver must be crushed…
    Red

    Like

  3. I recently visited the former home of a silent film star and the idea of silent movies is still something I’m trying to wrap my mind around. Great photo.

    Like

    • Miss Wordy!

      There was nothing silent about this film. Except for the sleeping part. And there was a lot of that. And piano noise too.

      Like

  4. I have a great idea for a porn featuring the bed piano….

    Like

  5. NotAPunkRocker // October 11, 2013 at 8:29 am //

    You had me at the title…keytars ROCK!

    \m/ (^_^) \m/

    Like

  6. Wait. What’s cash and where can I get me some?

    Like

  7. This is the best one on the picture topics yet. I especially liked the visual of the crash test dummy being scooped up by a tractor shovel. And the door to door salesman of useless home products.

    Like

  8. Sounds like Ward was too hard on the beav and someone got traded out for Walt.

    Like

  9. anitadesignstudio // October 11, 2013 at 1:20 pm //

    It took me a full 10 minutes to work where to post my flippin comment! Yea, welcome to my world. Loved the crash test dummy/tractor description! \m/

    Like

    • Neets, thank you, chicky! Its a tricky template. You might want to send a suggestion letter to our operations manager, Howard Gantz. *wink *wink

      Like

  10. anitadesignstudio // October 11, 2013 at 1:22 pm //

    *out…work OUT!! Jeez…

    Like

  11. Walt Cleaver? Was June a polygamist?! I have lost my innocence. 😦

    Like

  12. This is good but what id really like is a video of the photo shoot you and mike had together that day.

    Like

  13. whiteladyinthehood // October 11, 2013 at 7:14 pm //

    Freaky picture, but the post was funny as hell.

    Like

  14. If you travel to NJ I will buy a bed piano!

    Like

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