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LAP Update: Tour Stop Canceled in Kalamazoo, Michigan

Howard Gantz, manager here.

It is with sad and great regret that I have to announce the Round Table on Oct. 5th in Kalamazoo, Michigan with Long Awkward Pause has been cancelled.

If you have pre-purchased your tickets please email me and I will either send you tickets for another event or refund your money.

If you live in the Michigan area I believe there is two other events you may choose from:

On the 19th in Detroit is a random book signing by L.A.P. We currently have not published a book ourselves as a collective group, just bring us any old book from any author and we will sign it. Then on the 21st is the L.A.P. Annual Chili and Beer Tasting with all the proceeds going to the charity; Monkey’s Without Tails. This in honor of Monk Monkey’s Uncle. Don’t be a Monk Monkey’s Uncle and please have your tail check regularly by a professional…if you’re a monkey that is…

Now that the official business is out of the way, let me just rant here for a second…and this is just between you and me. I am kind of disgusted about this! The reason why the Round Table was cancelled is because the staff of L.A.P. were arguing over seat arrangement! Can you believe that?!

First off, Rants did not want to sit next to Monk Monkey because, and I quote, “I’m tired of you guys making me sit next to the Monkey! It’s not funny!”

(Which it is kind of funny to sit Rants next to the monkey! Shhhh!)

Then Monk Monkey did not want to sit next to Mike Calahan because he suspects Mike is always pulling on Monk’s tail when he is not looking.

Cordelia did not want to sit next to Chris because “All he does is stare at my boobs!”

Blogdramedy did not want to sit next to Len because “He makes fart noises with his armpit.”

Len did not want to sit next to Rants because “The camouflage clashes with his hat.”

Justin did not want to sit next to anyone because “He is the star of the group now.” He feels he should be in the front and center with a spotlight, crown, and scepter.”

Well I couldn’t find the exact scepter Justin wanted, so he threw a fit and went on a seven day Peanut M&M binge.

Coming down from a chocolate coma is not pretty. But on the plus side, I have a picture of Justin in just his long johns, passed out, covered in chocolate and peanut pieces for blackmail.

Not to worry, I have called one of those inspirational meetings, to whip these guys back into shape. I even have a guest speaker, Jim from GingerFightsBack. If they don’t come around he has promised to put Sausages on all their heads as punishment.

Once again, apologies. Don’t forget to hit the Challenge Us Here link at the top of the page to submit your ideas for questions or topics. Also T-Shirts are back in stock including X-Mediums. Stay tuned for October’s topics, they are just around the corner.

Until then, Howard Gantz, Manager.

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About Howard Gantz, Manager (11 Articles)
Howard Gantz, Manager of Long Awkward Pause here. My credentials include managing the super boy band 98 Back Sync and Ron Howard’s second cousin, Doogie Howard. My father is Richard Gantz, owner of the Gantz T-Shirt Factory.

29 Comments on LAP Update: Tour Stop Canceled in Kalamazoo, Michigan

  1. I never said that about Monk. I know better than to speak at meetings.

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  2. I want a seven day peanut m&m binge. Make that a seven day peanut BUTTER m&m binge.

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  3. You sound like a pack of divas

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  4. I’m going to put my best effort into coming up with a good topic.

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  5. Oh, Howard, you paint an accurate picture of me, right down to the tantrums, smeared chocolate, and proclivity for fighting over seat arrangements.

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  6. Howard, babe. Check your facts. Len uses BOTH armpits. If it was only one armpit, I’d sit on his other side.

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  7. For the record, I do not stare at anyone’s boobs. I take quick peeks.

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  8. Listen, It’s not so much Chris staring at my boobs, it’s when he tries to honk them in public that we begin to have a problem…

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