Occasionally we will get probing questions from our readers for the staff to answer.
Occasionally we don’t.
This could or could not be one of those occasions. You decide which.
Hasty of Hasty Words would like to know:
Regarding women, Do you think they are sexier on average with or without clothes?Roseanne, naked, doing a limbo dance, on a treadmill, in the wind, with chickens frantically flapping around, dropping feathers all over her, and then she slips, rolls backwards, flips off the back of the treadmill, butt in the air, and then an old cleaning man trots over and places a jar of peanut butter on each of her cheeks, before Donald Trump walks in (clothed) and yells “you’re fired” at a pot plant in the corner. HOT SEXY TIME RIGHT THERE, BROTHER! You know women have the better, sexier, bodies period. Us poor guys are just flat boards with an awkward jimmy dean sausage and two corn fritters sticking out. My favorite thing in the world, boobs, looks great both covered and uncovered. Sometimes the right cut dress is sexy. Sometimes removing that dress is sexier. I asked Hasty to send me pictures of her boobs both covered and uncovered to help illustrate this point, but all she sent me was a restraining order. I have a thing for smart women, studious and well-read women. Because of that, I think women with or without clothes are sexier above average and not on average. While the women with or without clothes on average are probably delightful company, I worry that they would become bored with me, finding my prized 1934 Shakespeare volumes and my 1912 copy of Huckleberry Finn to not be as remotely interesting as I do. Then again, the women with or without clothes above average tend to get bored with me, too. Oh god, I’m boring! So very boring. Let me think carefully about this one for a second… …Ok. It depends on the brand. Whenever I see a women sporting a designer outfit, like, for instance, something out of a E! runway recap, I’d much rather see her in the buff – not necessarily because she’s got a bod to drool over or not, but because most often the outfit looks like something that was designed in a Jim Henson workshop. Mahna Mahna. Do doo do do DOO! Yes. You’re kidding, right? I mean, seriously. On one hand, you have men. They need to be clothed, because obtrusive danglies. Now, on the other hand, you have women. They’re soft, caring, generally smell nice, and then they are shaped perfectly to elicit a very definite response from the male of the species. Clothing can suggest, hint, or tease – sometimes all at once. Remove the clothing and you get the same statement, only made speaking with a baseball-bat… straight to the turn-on part of the brain. Because boobs. Each mode is used for specific purposes. So the Rantswer® from my foxhole is: “Yes, both.”
My answer is naked, Always, always naked…unless it’s like…Margaret Thatcher, or my grandma, or..wait..Ok so there are a whole lot of women that I would not care to see naked.
Ok, so MOSTLY naked…others, on a case by case basis.