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Contest! Win A Long Awkward Pause Writer For A Week!

Announcing the Long Awkward Pause 2013 Contest!

Win A Long Awkward Pause Writer For A Week!

That’s right! Announcing the first Long Awkward Pause Contest where you could win a staff writer living with you for one whole week!

Choose from Justin, Rants, Monk Monkey, Chris, Mike, Chowderhead, Owamwarisan, or Cordelia.

If you win some of the great things your week could include are:

Learn the secrets of a professional writer. You will get tips on writing stories, blogs, poems, rantings, and/or real estate documents! Learn how to get your material published!


Plus, you get to make at least four home cooked meals of the writer’s choosing. Each meal should be no less than three courses.


And that’s not all…you also get to supply the writer with their favorite alcoholic drinks.


You will also get to treat them to three really nice restaurants of the writer’s choosing.

per se menu

If that wasn’t enough, you also win the opportunity to wait on the writer hand and foot providing such amenities as pampered massages, drawing hot baths, pedicures, manicures, and maybe even cucumber facials.


We almost forgot, you and your pick will go shopping! Yes, the two of you will get to shop for clothes for your favorite writer so don’t forget to bring that credit card!


And if that wasn’t enough, you also get to provide entertainment! You and your favorite writer will hang out and paint the town red. Providing on where you live, some things you could foot the bill for might include; a sporting event, night clubs, amusement parks, or even a Broadway show. The possibilities are endless.

It’s your prize, go crazy!


To enter just follow the link to our contest page above. In the form pick the writer you would like to spend a week with and in 500 words or less explain why. Please also supply a financial statement  and samples of your cooking.

Odds of winning are 1 in 8. Rules are subject to change. Contest not valid in China or Nebraska.  Contest winner must agree to and supply all of the winnings. Long Awkward Pause and L.A.P. are copyrighted and may not be used without expressed written permission of the National Football League. Family members of Long Awkward Pause are not eligible.
About Christopher De Voss (132 Articles)
One Of The Hosts Of Podcast 42. Voice over actor, writer on various websites, published author, should not eat cheese but still does. Follow me on twitter: @chrisdevoss Follow the show on twitter at @podcast42show

46 Comments on Contest! Win A Long Awkward Pause Writer For A Week!

  1. I pick Chowderhead. Why? He’s the only one I know about thus far. Well, and now also Christopher De Voss.
    Financial statement: I am broke.
    Cooking: Yogurt.
    It doesn’t sound like much, but I live in Scotland, which is a nice place to visit. And, boobs.


  2. I just had Stephen King to stay. I’m not doing anything like that again. He’s working on his next novel and insisted I read his daily notes. I didn’t sleep for a week. It was a NIGHTMARE!


  3. I have the plenty of cooking samples on my blog. Now, as for the financial statement, can residents or broke countries enter?


  4. My choice would be Chris, to pick his brain about writing. BUT…No A/C, sleeping with 5 dogs, the best restaurant in town serves fried chicken gizzards, he might die from my cooking, and shopping means the Hospice thrift shop or the dollar store. If he lasts longer than 2 days in this house, I would be more than a bit surprised. He would have quite a story to tell–if he’s man enough to live through it.


  5. I have the prefect dinner/facial for you with seaweed, avocado, cucumber and olive oil. What you don’t eat can be massaged into your face. Yay or nay?


  6. I want all the contestants to know that I like cucumbers on my eyes. My sunglasses actually hold cucumbers so I can have that sensation while I drive.

    If you win me, I will expect that you have your own vegetable peeler as TSA policy prohibits me from bringing my own


  7. I will pay each of the writers a $100 (USD, but I live close to Canada if you want it in Loonies) to Stay the hell away from Maine.

    Thank you.



  8. I pick Monk Monkey
    I live in India
    I have money
    I am willing to shift to Vegas ( or any place of Monk Monkey’s choice) to enter the contest.
    cooking skills great Indian specially Bengali food
    Plus i am fine with bribing, anything to get the work done. So….


  9. Well I’ve got some community service due soon, we could hit up the soup kitchen, so that’s like dinner and a night out with the locals. As far as hooch, there’s a big ass jar of olives in the back of my fridge that I don’t remember being green when I bought them so that’s like vintage shit right? Plus there’s probably some of that paint thinner under the sink that tastes just like Martini & Rossi, and if ya’ add a little vanilla extract we could have a nice Noilly Prat cocktail before we retire on the hidabed and watch my complete box set silverfox edition of press your luck on beta. The memories we could make, hmmm……….


  10. Of note, I am probably the cheapest pick here. Just saying.


  11. oops, i may be disqualified for not following the rules )


  12. ok when you say “professional writer” exactly what criteria have these people met to make them “professional writers”? Also, are any vegetarian, vegan or gluten-free? I’m a carnivore and everything in my fridge will likely offend that person^^.


  13. Pick me, pick me, pick me, pick me…


  14. whiteladyinthehood // August 29, 2013 at 10:29 pm //

    Oh, I’ll take Rants! Especially if he’s cheap! Tell him to bring his guns, ammo, grenades and don’t forget the tank! He can clean up the Hood for me. (I will throw in a free home cooked meal)


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